I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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