Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
