Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
