I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
