I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
