We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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