Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
