if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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