I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So I just went to clothing optional bar
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
