just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
