didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Alive.
So much puke
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
