he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
