making cat noises will not fix the situation.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
