Plan B is the new Plan A
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
