And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
