You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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