Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
