I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
