Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
