I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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