Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
