is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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