If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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