I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
