I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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