after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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