2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
