tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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