I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
organizing the empties. That sober.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
