It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
