She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
