The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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