I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
