U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Randomize
