she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize