I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
