Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Randomize
