I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
We don't watch enough power rangers
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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