My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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