summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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