I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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