I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
