So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
