Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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