the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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