Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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