did you get engaged???
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Randomize
