the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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