He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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