:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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